10 Things You Should NEVER Say Abroad! Unless You Enjoy Instant Cringe…

Think You’re Just Making Small Talk? In Another Country, It Might End the Conversation Fast.

I once made a man in Ukraine go from smiling to staring at me like I’d just asked for his bank PIN and his grandmother’s secret borscht recipe in one breath.

All I said was, “So, what do you do?”

Seems harmless, right? In the U.S., that’s standard small talk, right up there with “How about this weather?” and “Did you see the game last night?”

But in post-Soviet Ukraine back in 1999, that question wasn’t just nosy. It was borderline offensive.

Big mistake!

Turns out, what’s innocent small talk in America can sound like an FBI interrogation overseas.

That was the day I realized that some of the most casual, everyday questions in one culture can come across as rude, invasive, or just plain bizarre in another.

It’s not just in Ukraine. 

I’ve accidentally set off cultural landmines in Spain, Georgia, and even France, where a bartender in Dieppe mistook “How are you?” as permission to unload his entire existential crisis.

One innocent question, and suddenly, I’m the unwilling therapist to a man questioning his life choices over a glass of pastis.

So, if you think you’re just making polite conversation while traveling or chatting with someone from another country, think again.

What sounds like harmless small talk can hit like a bad joke, then turn into awkward silence.

That silence won’t just haunt you for days either. 

It’ll replay in your head at 2 a.m. like the world’s most cringeworthy highlight reel.

Alright, so brace yourself! Here are 10 innocent-sounding questions that might just makes someone from another country stare, cringe, or straight-up walk away…

The 10 Things You Should Never Say… And Why

1. ”So, What Do You Think About the U.S. President?”

Ask this in the U.S., and you’ll get a heated opinion and amateur political punditry.

Ask it abroad, and you might start an international incident.

I once brought up U.S. politics over drinks in Spain, thinking it would be light, but interesting conversation…

Instead, a man’s face turned red, fists clenched, and suddenly, I was trapped in a TED Talk on NATO and global affairs.

In France, my best friend’s brother launched into a 30-minute tirade about U.S. imperial aggression, waving his wine glass so aggressively I half-expected him to declare a “Workers of the World Unite” revolution right there at dinner.

In some countries, this question sparks outrage, in others, a geopolitical meltdown right before your very eyes.

Either way, unless you’re prepared to defend every U.S. policy since the Cold War, maybe stick to safer topics, like sports.

But even that’s risky in the UK, especially soccer.

2. “What Do You Do?” 

In America, this is standard small talk. Abroad? It can come off as prying into someone’s tax returns.

The first time I made this mistake was in 1999 in post-Soviet Ukraine.

Sitting at a table in a simple gathering with a drink, I tried to break the ice with some small talk and casually asked my girlfriend’s friend’s boyfriend, “So, what do you do?”

His answer: “Business.”

Curious, I asked, “Oh, what kind of business?”

His response, with a slight lean forward and an eyebrow raise: “Just business.”

Did I stop? 

Of course not.

“What kind of business is ‘just business’?” I persisted with a little humor mixed in to ease the growing awkwardness.

He shot me a look colder than a Kyiv winter and said, “None of your business.”

Moral of the story: In some cultures, asking about someone’s work isn’t just nosy it can feel intrusive, even suspicious. At least it was in 1999 post-Soviet Ukraine…

3. “How Are You?” 

You might think this is the safest question of all. But in some cultures, it’s an actual question, not a meaningless pleasantry.

Take France, for example. I once greeted a bartender in Dieppe with a cheerful “How are you?” expecting the standard “Good, you?” in return.

Instead, I got a five-minute rant about his boss, his neighbor’s dog, the off-season tourist lull, the failing French economy, and an existential crisis about the meaning of life.

Lesson learned: Be careful what you ask for.

4. “You Speak English So Well!” 

You might mean this as a compliment, but it often lands like an insult.

Why? Because it assumes they shouldn’t speak English well.

Or that it’s some extraordinary feat rather than something they’ve been doing since grade school.

I once witnessed a fellow foreigner at a local Irish Pub in Tbilisi tell a well-spoken Georgian woman, “Wow, your English is amazing!”

She just smirked and said, “Thanks. So is yours.”

5. “How Much Did That Cost?” 

Unless you want to be stared at like you just licked a subway pole, avoid asking about money.

A fellow pilgrim on the Camino de Santiago in Spain casually mentioned how cheap his meal was when the bill arrived.

The locals reacted as if he’d just asked for some ketchup to put on his paella.

In some cultures, discussing prices is crass.

In others, it’s straight-up taboo.

So unless you’re at a flea market negotiating over a fake Gucci belt, steer clear of price talk.

6. “Do You Believe in God?” 

Unless you want to turn your casual conversation into an impromptu TED Talk, or a full-blown debate… skip this one.

I once met a backpacker in a Spanish hostel who, in his attempt at friendly conversation, asked someone about their faith.

Within minutes, half the hostel common room had joined the discussion, voices were rising, and it looked like we were one comment away from a full-blown theological standoff.

Religion isn’t small talk. It’s dynamite. Handle with care.

7. “Are You Married? Why Not?”

Somewhere in the world, there’s a person still recovering from the time I made this mistake.

In some places, marriage is everything.

In others, the idea of asking about someone’s relationship status is as personal as asking for their medical history.

A traveler I met in Mexico once casually asked a local woman why she wasn’t married yet.

Her face dropped. The air got thick.

Someone cleared their throat.

And that traveler suddenly wished they had asked literally anything else.

8. “Smile! You Look So Serious.” 

You ever tell a German to smile? I have. Never again.

Not everyone walks around grinning like a contestant on “The Price is Right”.

Some cultures reserve smiles for when they actually mean them.

In France, a stranger smiling at you in public might be seen as creepy.

In Ukraine, it might make you look a little unhinged or you’re looking to scam them.

So if someone isn’t smiling, it’s probably not because they forgot how.

9. “Wow, Your Accent Is So… Cute!” 

What might seem like a compliment can actually feel pretty condescending.

Imagine living in another country, learning their language fluently, and someone still reducing your speech to “cute.”

It’s like patting a child on the head for trying their best in kindergarten and giving them a gold star.

A friend in France, who spoke flawless English, once told me that when people said this to her, she wanted to reply, “Thanks! Your grammar mistakes are adorable too.”

10. “Why Don’t You Move to the U.S.?” 

Ah, the classic American assumption.

I once asked a Spaniard this, assuming he’d jump at the chance to live in the “Land of Opportunity.” 

His response?

A laugh, followed by a detailed list of reasons why he had no desire to deal with healthcare costs, insane work hours, or the idea of “hustle culture.”

Not everyone sees America as the dream. Some people actually like not spending half their paycheck on medical bills.

How to Avoid These Awkward Moments 

If you don’t want to accidentally offend someone, here’s how to play it safe:

• Pick better icebreakers: Instead of “Where are you from?” try “What brought you here?”
• Read the room: If everyone else is keeping it light, don’t dive into deep personal questions.
• Listen more, assume less: If someone wants to share something, they will.

Conversations Are an Art, not a Transaction

At the end of the day, being a great traveler, or just a great conversationalist, isn’t about knowing everything.

It’s about knowing what not to say.

So next time you strike up a conversation with someone from another country, remember: some questions open doors, while others slam them shut.

What’s the most awkward conversation mistake you’ve ever made abroad?