6 Hard Truths I Learned About Chasing Happiness Abroad And Finally Finding Fulfillment!

The Myths of Happiness Abroad… What I Wish I Knew Before Moving Away

I used to think moving abroad would be the answer to everything.

• Stress? Gone.
• Boredom? Never again.
• The nagging existential crisis of wondering if I was wasting my life? Vanished.

I had this grand vision of myself, sipping espresso in a Parisian café, effortlessly chatting in French, somehow having miraculously developed the cheekbones of the 1960s film star, Alain Delon.

What actually happened?

I ended up alone in a tiny Georgian basement apartment, reheating some chicken dish for the third night in a row, contemplating whether talking to the local convenience store clerk who barely spoke English about the weather counted as human interaction.

When I first packed my bags and left for a life of adventure, I was chasing something I couldn’t quite name.

Freedom, excitement, a chance to start over… maybe even a bit of all three. And at first? It was incredible.

Walking down cobblestone streets in Strasbourg, France.

Finding hidden wine bars in Tbilisi, Georgia.

Getting lost in the winding alleyways of Barcelona, Spain long before it became overrun with tourists getting water-gunned down by fed-up locals trying to reclaim their city.

Everything felt new, intoxicating, like I had cracked the code to life itself.

But then, somewhere between the third visa renewal and the fiftieth time explaining that yes, I’m from the USA, but no, I don’t eat McDonald’s every day, the shine started to wear off.

I realized that no matter how many breathtaking landscapes I stood in front of, how many new foods I tried, or how many languages I butchered in attempts to “immerse myself,” something was still missing.

Was moving abroad really the key to happiness, or had I just found a more scenic place to be lost?

1. The Honeymoon Phase: Why Moving Abroad Feels Like a Dream at First

Ah, the first few months abroad… the golden phase where everything feels like an Instagram reel come to life.

The air smells different, the people seem effortlessly cool, and even something as mundane as buying toothpaste feels like an adventure.

I remember my first weeks in Georgia, where I thought I was about to live my best life.

• Freshly baked khachapuri? Heaven.
• Affordable wine that flows like tap water? Nirvana.
• The idea that I had somehow “figured it all out” just by moving? Dangerous.

Living in a new country feels like reinvention.

• The mistakes of the past? Left at the departure gate.
• That nagging feeling that life had become a predictable loop? Gone.

You become the mysterious foreigner, the one who “just up and left” to chase their dreams.

You post sunset shots from your balcony in Saranda, Albania, staring at the Greek island of Corfu right across the Ionian Sea and write cryptic captions like “Life begins at the edge of your comfort zone”.

You wait for the likes to roll in.

For that never ending holy grail of validation, that you’re living the dream….

And for a while, it works.

Every new street, every new meal, every failed attempt at speaking the language feels exhilarating.

But then… something shifts.

2. The Reality Check: When the High Fades

There’s a moment, usually around month three or four, where the rose-colored glasses start slipping.

Suddenly, the novelty of the morning espresso at that charming café in Kyiv, being waited on by a gorgeous Ukrainian girl wears off.

Living the dream?

Those quirky local traditions you once found charming?

Now, they only remind you of just how different you still are.

It’s not just the obvious things like language barriers or missing your favorite comfort foods.

It’s the invisible walls never quite knowing if you’re being polite enough, if you’re overstepping cultural boundaries, or if you’ll ever truly belong.

Friends come and go (especially in countries with very liberal visa stay policies), because many of them are just passing through, and locals?

They’ve got their own lives.

The feeling of being a visitor never quite fades.

I remember one night in Kyiv, months before my final departure.

There I was, staring at my phone, realizing that despite being in a city of millions, despite the fact that I had lived and worked in that country for nearly 2 decades, I had no one to call.

Back home, I had a history, family, and inside jokes that spanned half my lifetime.

Here?

I had a few acquaintances who might remember me if I left tomorrow.

That kind of isolation is something no postcard-worthy skyline of golden domes can fix.

3. The Trap of Always Seeking “The Next Place”

“Maybe I just haven’t found the right place yet.”

This is how it starts.

You convince yourself that if you just move one more time, everything will finally click into place. That Poland had become too touristy, but maybe Bulgaria will feel more authentic.

That you just need to head to Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Uzbekistan or Jerkoffistan because that’s where the real expat life happens.

Before you know it, you’re not chasing fulfillment, you’re just chasing movement.

New visas, new apartments, new cities.

But instead of fixing the loneliness, you’re just packing it up and taking it with you.

I met a guy in Thailand who had lived in 12 different countries in five years.

When I asked him which felt most like home, he shrugged and said, “I don’t know. I haven’t found it yet.”

That’s when it hit me, maybe the problem isn’t the place.

Maybe it’s the idea that happiness is something you “find” rather than something you create.

4. The Shift: How I Stopped Searching for Happiness and Started Creating It

The biggest lesson? Happiness isn’t waiting for you at the next destination.

I had to redefine what fulfillment meant beyond just location. I started slowing down instead of running.

I learned to appreciate routine in foreign places instead of treating every city like a temporary playground.

I stopped expecting every move to fix what I hadn’t taken the time to fix in myself.

And it’s still a work in progress…

When I look back, I realize that it was the little things that made the biggest difference.

Perhaps happiness wasn’t to be found in traveling to new destinations, but it was there all along in the destinations and people I had left behind..

Like learning enough of the local language to have real conversations, committing to friendships that might not last forever, but mattered in the moment.

Finding joy in ordinary things rather than just the big travel moments.

Stability isn’t the enemy of adventure… sometimes, it’s what makes adventure sustainable.

5. What I Wish I Knew Before Moving Abroad

1. Moving abroad won’t magically solve personal struggles. If you were unhappy before, you’ll eventually be unhappy abroad.

The scenery changes, but the internal work still has to be done.

2. You can build a life anywhere… but you have to commit. Treating every city as a short-term escape will make it feel exactly like that.

If you want deeper friendships, a sense of belonging, and real fulfillment, you have to stay long enough to build them.

3. The best experiences happen when you stop chasing and start embracing. It’s not about collecting places like trophies… it’s about being present where you are.

Some of my best memories abroad weren’t from adrenaline-packed adventures, but from simple moments…

Morning coffee at a local cafe in Tbilisi or laughing with new friends in Pub in Kyiv.

And nowadays, it’s become as simple as just sitting on my balcony here in Saranda, Albania sipping an espresso, overlooking the Ionian sea and staring at the Greek island of Corfu, realizing that I don’t need to be anywhere else.

6. Finding Contentment, No Matter Where You Are

I used to think that fulfillment was about where I lived but now, I know it’s about how I live.

Moving abroad is incredible. It opens your eyes, challenges you, and changes you in ways you never expected.

But it’s not a magic fix for everything that feels off in your life.

Because if happiness always feels one more plane ticket away, then it will never feel close enough to grasp.

If there’s one thing I know now, it’s this: the happiest moments aren’t always in the grand adventures.

They’re in the stillness, in the connections you make, and in the simple, ordinary moments that remind you you’re exactly where you need to be.

Have you ever felt like you were chasing happiness?